Long Time, No ... Blog

Hey guys!

I realize it's been well over a month since I last blogged. How did that happen? Guess I've been pretty busy. I apologize. But, it's good to be back and blogging again!

If you didn't notice, I got some new "pets" on my page. Check out the fishies over there --> Cute, eh? :)

Notable things that have happened in my life since I last blogged:

- I decided I am going to Hampshire College this fall. Woohoo! :D
- Primarily I've been focusing on writing Rage. I'm on about page 80 now and a little past 45,000 words, although I'm a bit stuck ... Hopefully I can get myself out of the corner I've written myself into. I also got an idea for a new story, which I'm having difficulty explaining to people because I'm not entirely sure what it's about yet ... Let's just say, it's about ballet and sibling rivalry, and yesterday I read a 30 page guide on amputations. (Oh, the things I do for writing.)
- I didn't make it to the semifinals of ABNA, and my Publishers Weekly review of Edge was ... not so positive, but it had its useful tidbits. The reviewer called my book "video game esque", "lukewarm", and "dotted with stock characters" among other things. However, he/she said the writing was "consistent enough to maintain interest" and that there was "potential for a riveting story here in this manuscript"––so, at least there's some hope. I saw the reviews of some other manuscripts that were far less encouraging, so I'm grateful mine at least suggested there's a chance it could be a good story. The review will be helpful once I start editing Edge again––although that probably won't be for a while since it's not my primary focus. And I'm glad I at least got a good review of Walking Shadow last year.
- I've been thinking of adding something *NEW* to this blog. (Besides the fish...) But I would need some help from you guys. See, I've been thinking I'd like to post critiques of other writers' first paragraphs, if anyone is willing/interested. I could do it once a week, like a "First-Paragraph Friday" or something. I think it would help to blog more about the editing process and show it in a more hands-on style. So, if anyone would like a critique feel free to email me! (brigidrgh@gmail.com)

Hope everyone is having wonderful lives and success in their writing. I will try not to fall off the face of the Blog-World again anytime soon. :)

Tuesday's Coming! Did you bring your coat?!

Ah-hem. It's Tuesday! (The title of this post is a reference to Rejected Cartoons––which you shouldn't watch if you are easily disturbed O_o)

So now it's time for a Tuesday Teaser! Lately I've been working on Rage more than anything else, so I guess that is what I will post for today. Enjoy!

“Natasha, dear. You're shaking. What's wrong?”

I bowed my head. “Mother Dearest, I … I don't know if you'll forgive me for what I did.”

“I'll always forgive you, dear.” She placed one of her hands over mine. “Now tell me, what is it?”

“I went into the forest.” I said it before I could stop myself. I dared to look up, and saw Mother Dearest's gray eyes grow wide.

“Do you mean … ?”

“Yes. I went … far into the forest. It––It was a demon that attacked me.”

A moment ago, Mother Dearest's hand had been gentle and comforting, but now she gripped my wrist with surprising strength and hissed, “What were you thinking?”

I'd never seen her like this––her eyes blazing, her whole body trembling. It took me a moment to get over my surprise and find my voice again.

“I don't know,” I answered hoarsely. “I'm sorry.”

“Sorry?” Mother Dearest repeated the word like it carried a fatal disease. “You could have disrupted the entire balance …” She trailed off, sinking back into her chair again and letting go of me.

I rubbed at my throbbing wrist, my head reeling.

“I'm sorry,” Mother Dearest sighed, but I could see that she was still shaking.

“No, I … You have a right to be angry,” I said. “And I know I should never have gone into the forest. But, listen to me. I––I need to tell you what I saw.”

Mother Dearest didn't protest, but she didn't urge me to keep speaking, either. She only looked at me, her face draining of color until it was nearly white. Although I'd always known she was old, I'd always thought of her as being eternally young and strong. Now, for once, her age showed in every line on her skin. She appeared so small, so frail. I was almost afraid my words would break her apart … yet, I had to tell her. She was the only one who would be able to do something, if anyone could.

“I think … I think maybe the Sacrifices are still alive,” I said.

Mother Dearest still didn't answer. She only gazed at me, the fire flickering in her eyes.

“I met someone in the forest,” I went on, my voice lowering until it was almost a whisper. “It was dark and I couldn't see, but … I'm pretty sure he was a human being. And he knew Caroline. He thought I was her.”

Mother Dearest looked away, holding tightly to the armrest on her chair. The only sound in the room was the fire crackling.

“Please,” I said, at last. “You have to believe me. There was someone in that forest, and … and my sister could be out there, too.”

“I believe you,” Mother Dearest answered, her voice empty of emotion. She slowly rose to her feet, and stood before the fire with her back facing me. “Who else have you told?”

“What?”

“Did you tell anyone else about what you saw?”

“No, I … only Brandon.”

Mother Dearest turned toward me, half of her face illuminated in the fire's orange glow, and the other half in shadow. “And what did he say?”

“He said not to tell anyone. But, I felt like I had to tell you. I thought you'd know what to do.”

“Hmm,” Mother Dearest murmured. She strolled away from the fireplace, walking along the wall and trailing a hand over her books. “Natasha, you would be wise to listen to your older brother.”

Almost involuntarily, I jumped to my feet. “What?”

“I don't want you telling anyone else about this.” Mother Dearest pulled a book from place and opened it, leafing through its pages.

“But––But I know what I saw!” I burst, unable to contain myself anymore. “I'm not insane. Don't you understand? We need to do something!”

“Like what?” Mother Dearest snapped, slamming her book shut. “Send everyone into the forest with their weapons, only to be slaughtered by demons?”

“But––”

“Our population is dwindling, Natasha. We can't afford that.”

“But what about the Sacrifices? What about Caroline?” A lump swelled in my throat, choking my words. “We need to try …”

“No.” Mother Dearest turned around briskly, pushing the book back into its place on the shelf. “I don't want to hear another word about this. I don't want you spreading this story of yours throughout the Village, either. I want you to pretend like this never happened, do you understand?”

No. No, it wasn't supposed to happen like this. Mother Dearest was supposed to make everything all right. She was supposed to see that this was our opportunity to go into the forest, to save the Sacrifices, to kill the Monster.

“I'm the only person who's ever made it out of the forest alive!” I cried. “How can you tell me to forget what I saw?”

“Because you were never supposed to see it,” Mother Dearest said. “And your story will only endanger the other Villagers. Please, Natasha. Stay away from the forest, and never tell anyone what you saw there.”

“I …”

“Promise me.” Mother Dearest's eyes flashed, like a pair of gray storm clouds flickering with lightning.

I looked down, noticing how my dirty old shoes appeared out-of-place in the middle of the intricately designed carpet.

“Yes, Mother Dearest,” I whispered. “I promise.”

Guest Post: Nellee Horne on Self-Publishing

OH, BOY! FIRST EVER GUEST POST! I KNOW YOU'RE ALL EXCITED!

So, I mentioned that this would be happening in my most recent post, "On Being Brilliant". But, in case you forgot, Nellee is a friend I met through ABNA (which she also entered) . She's the 16-year-old author of Meeting Death (Kensey's Story), which is available on Amazon. She also has a wonderful blog which you guys should check out. :)

Nellee is a self-published author. Now, I have no experience with self-publishing. I chose to go the traditional publishing route, because a) I get professional feedback from literary agents (even if they reject my manuscript), and b) I hope that if my book is published traditionally, it will reach a wider audience. Also, tremendous success in self-publishing is rare––but there are inspirational cases such as Amanda Hocking and Christopher Paolini. And with her great determination, I'm sure Nellee will also go very far with her self-publishing endeavors!

So, without further ado, I present to you Nellee Horne's post about why she loves self-publishing! Learn and enjoy!

Ok, I’ve met a lot of people in the writing communities who are either for traditional publishing, self-publishing, or are split down the middle. In this post I will discuss my decision to self-publish.

I attempted to traditional publish a little over a year ago. I didn’t try that hard so it’s not like my decision was because I was desperate.

I sent a query directly to a publishing house and then to an agent. They rejected me. Well, they said it was because they were busy with other projects which I could easily understand. They receive possibly thousands of queries a day and they don’t have enough agents to look over every one and pick anyone. It took from February 12 to March 22, 2010 just to hear about the query, which was a summary and the first twelve pages of my book. I immediately began searching for new agents to try, but found some articles and reviews from people who talked about how great their experience was with self-publishing. I discarded it because one of my friends had said before that self-publishing was really hard and I wanted to make it to the best-sellers list and go on tour and be a common name among YA readers like Cassandra Clare, Stephenie Meyer, etc. (I think most writers want that.) I didn’t want to do that, but it interested me so I kept researching.

I found out about this woman (and I’m still trying to find this particular article for my friend Brigid here :)) who wrote an eight book YA series. The last book was split into two because it was too long. But, the editor completely changed the beginning of the eighth book without the author’s permission. She protested but because the publishing house owned most of the rights, there was nothing she could do. That really made up my mind. I wanted my book to be the way I wanted it to be; I didn’t want somebody who thought they knew what readers want and what not.

I looked into self-publishing again. I looked at what I had to do, people’s experience, and people’s success with it. I read one woman (she went with Lulu.com not CreateSpace like me) who self-published a book about her story of cancer or some kind of disease and she was interviewed by Oprah! I was amazed!

I also found out about some authors switching to self-publishing. Now why would they do that? They had an agent, they had an editor, they were going on tour, and they were selling hundreds of thousands of copies. Why would they give that all up? Because they could keep all of the rights and they could make a living.

Some people won’t read or review self-published books because they automatically assume that the person must have been desperate or this was their last resort and they must have been rejected by tons of agents. I could totally see that, but it’s simply not the case for most authors who self-published. It wasn’t for me.

I published my 300 page, 109,000 word YA novel with CreateSpace and Kindle publishing. I knew what was ahead when I made this decision, but I knew that, if I tried hard enough, which I was determined to do, I could make it to Oprah. (Then I found out that Oprah was ending so I changed Oprah to Ellen :))

Publishers and agents like to believe they know what readers want in a YA book. No they don’t. Here are some examples:

1) Look up Amanda Hocking first of all.

2) Freddy Krueger. That movie was rejected by all of the studios. However, the director or producer or whatever believed in his work so much and knew in his heart that it could be big, he decided to do the hard thing and make his own studio and make The Nightmare on Elm Street an independent film. Well, it’s become a 500 million dollar franchise. He brought the movie to the people and let them decide how far it was going to go.

3) Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream. This is a little different but still the same outcome. It started with an idea and then a shop. Then, they wanted their ice cream to appear in stores. Pillsburry didn’t like that so they tried to tear them down and threaten them because they saw Ben and Jerry as competition. Ben and Jerry brought it to the people; let them know what Pillsburry was trying to do. The people sent tons of complaints to Pillsburry and they backed off.

4) America…the people rule.

It’s always the same outcome, isn’t it? I figured I’d let the people decide how far my book goes. It can go far but then it can’t.

A publishing contract does not guarantee success.

I read this comment somewhere: The good thing about self-publishing is that anyone can publish a book. The bad thing about self-publishing is that anyone can publish a book. So true.

Jacqueline Howett is a perfect example. (Brigid interrupts to say ... If you don't know who Jacqueline Howett is, read this blog post and the comments on it, and … then you'll know.)

The ones who can’t write outweigh the ones who can and who just want more control and rights and what they believe is best for their book. People like Jacqueline give people like me and Amanda Hocking and a lot of other self-published authors a bad name. It breaks my heart especially when I read things like, “And this is why I don’t review self-published books.”

Financially, it’s a great choice as well. An author who has been with a publishing house for seven years only gets $0.68 per paperback while I can get $3 per paperback and per e-book. If I and a traditional published author sell 100,000 copies in one year, who makes more? I do. I’d make $274,000 while he/she made $68,000. That’s about how much my father makes in a year. Some authors make less than that yet they sell the same amount of copies and they still have a day job.

I would like to make a living off my books. I want to be a full-time author, not part-time.

I know it can be difficult, but with all this social networking, it’s easier than how it used to be. Word of mouth can get you far.

I really want to be that person who shows people the other side to publishing. I want to be an example of perseverance and determination. I don’t have someone providing everything for me. I can’t go on tour and I can’t set up book signings myself. I don’t have the time what with my school and everything. But, I can let all that go for more rights and for my family to have a better life than what we have now. I just want to be an author, but I also want to be a self-made woman and to be an example and show others that you can do it yourself.

I know, very long post. :) Here's a post from the dark side! Muhahah! JK

Thank you, Nellee! :)

So, what do you think, fellow writers? Do you prefer self-publishing or traditional publishing? Why? Are you undecided? Share your thoughts!

On Being Brilliant

I'm in a happy mood right now, so I'm going to write a random blog post expressing my random thoughts.

Four exciting things first:

1. I got into Hampshire! Yaaaaay!!! :) Now to choose … Hampshire or Emerson, Hampshire or Emerson … Well, I have about a month to think about it. And it depends on a lot of boring money stuff and whatnot. Anyway ...

2. My ABNA excerpt is now up on Amazon! It's available as a free Kindle download. So you can read it if a) you have a Kindle, or b) you download the free Kindle app. If you guys would check it out, that'd be just splendid! *thumbs up* Thanks! Love ya!

3. This blog will soon experience its first guest post, from my friend and fellow teenage writer, Nellee Horne. She's 16 years old and is a self-published author! Here is her blog and a link to her book on Amazon. :)

4. One of my plays was chosen to be featured at a young playwrights festival this Thursday ... I even get to rehearse with the actors and stuff! *squee* I will most certainly blog about this. :)

Now, for today's topic ...

ON BEING BRILLIANT.

I had an epiphany about this lately, so I thought I'd share it with the world.

At some point (or at many points) all writers must wonder, "What makes an author brilliant?" Surely you've read something before that was so good, it made you want to tear your own writing to shreds. You finished reading, and you thought, "Why can't I be that gosh darn brilliant?"

We tend to use the word as if it's a God-given trait. But the truth is, no one is born brilliant. In fact, the world's most acclaimed authors are/were extremely critical of themselves. For example, James Joyce nearly burned his original manuscript of Portrait of an Artist as a Young Man, and similarly Vladamir Nabakov attempted to burn Lolita. Harper Lee threw To Kill a Mockingbird out a window after working on it for five years.

I don't know about you, but I find these things pretty shocking! To think the world could have lost some of its most amazing books because their authors thought they would never be good ... ! Ack, I don't even know how to complete the thought. It blows my mind.

But then again, I am very critical of my own writing. I doubt I'd ever go so far as to burn (or otherwise destroy) anything I'd written, but there are definitely many days where I hate my own work––where I attempt to write or edit, and I end up crying in a fetal position instead. (Well, not literally––most of the time––but you know what I mean.) Just ask any of my writing-ninja friends; they have to tolerate my whining every single day. Bahaha.

It's not that I don't believe I'm talented. If I didn't think I could achieve brilliance, why else would I write? Is it not the writer's life goal to change the world with one book, to make everyone see life in a new way? There must be some reason why I'm sitting here, banging my head against the keyboard ... Because I have something to say, godammit! I just need to figure out how to say it, first. I have to find my own voice.

That's what all writers want to achieve––the ability to express the meanings of life in a way no one has done it before. And as I'm sure you all know, it's pretty dang frustrating. You often have that feeling like "It's all been done before. Why am I so special?"

But the thing is, that's the feeling that helps you get better at writing. That's what drives you to keep trying. If you already said to yourself, "Hey! I'm brilliant!" you'd stop trying to get better. You wouldn't try anything new, and you wouldn't take any risks.

That's the thing about the world's most brilliant authors ... They don't realize how brilliant they are! It's the struggle to create something ideal, which drives them to try crazy new things in their writing. That dedication and courage is, ultimately, what makes a writer unique and unforgettable.

Agree? Disagree? Share your thoughts!

Another wonderful Tuesday! (And this one is particularly wonderful)

Hello, blog-world! I have two very good pieces of news today. :)

1. I GOT INTO EMERSON. AAHHH! I'M GOING TO COLLEGE. (Assuming I get the financial aid I need and whatnot.) I'm so excited! For those of you who don't know, Emerson has an excellent writing program. And it's right in Boston, so I'd still be close to home. So psyched! :)

2. I MADE THE QUARTERFINALS OF ABNA. So, I got two reviews on my excerpt of Edge. I'm pretty happy with them.

The first reviewer said the strongest aspect of the excerpt is the voice. "The writing sounded like an 18 year old was talking rather than an adult trying to be hip or a forced teenage voice." HA! How funny is that? ;) And he/she concluded by saying, "The author has a clear vision of what he sees and how his characters feel, and expresses it concisely and fully. I loved it, and will be looking forward to it’s release." Well, despite the typo and the fact that my reviewer thinks I'm a man, that's pretty good stuff! (Actually, I'm happy that he/she thinks I'm a man since my protagonist is male. Guess I make a convincing boy!)

The second reviewer was not quite so positive ... He/she said the strongest aspect is that the plot is "interesting" and it has a good hook, etc. However, he/she said it was "frustrating to read. Maxwell (the main character) is an idiot. ... But he IS amusing in his stupidity." I guess that could be taken as harsh ... but I'm not all that offended. I actually agree, kind of. Max does start off as rather stupid ... but (I hope) he develops more, later on in the story. ;) And even if he is idiotic, he is endearingly so! I still love him. :) Anyway, this reviewer ended by saying it was better than 80% of the excerpts he/she had read, and that it was "pretty good". *Shrugs* So it's not a glowing review, but it's not scathing either and I'm thankful for that.

What both reviewers seemed to agree upon was that Max accepts his situation too easily. He just wakes up with no memory, has a voice in his head telling him what to do, and he's like "This is weird, but … OKAY!" And yeah, I think they're right. The pacing is a bit rushed. So, I should work on that. :P

I guess the lesson to be learned here is, you need to give your characters strong and realistic emotional reactions in order to hook the reader. Part of what draws the reader in isn't just a good plot (although that's also pretty essential), but also a character that is real and relatable.

So, this means I'm going to get a Publishers Weekly review. HOLY TALKING MUSHROOMS. I'm terrified. Well, I'll be sure to update on that once I get it. (Which will be on April 26th. *already biting nails*) And soon my excerpt of Edge will go live on Amazon (so it will be available as a free download for Kindle! Woot woot!). I'll post a link as soon as it goes up! :)

Also, I recently did an interview about Walking Shadow with Ana Mardoll––a vine reviewer from ABNA. Check it out here!

It's Tuesday. You know the drill.

Hello, people out there! Wow ... does this blog really have more than 5000 views? That's pretty awesome. :)

I'm not really writing anything currently, but I'm giving Walking Shadow another edit. (Still need to cut out about 30,000 words. GRRR!) So, I figured I'd post another teaser from it today. I think I've only posted one teaser from it before, anyway.

Now I need to finish writing a poem for Writing class. (What else rhymes with "grow"? *chews end of pencil*)

Enjoy this (very short) teaser, in which Cassandra has creepy dreams and such. Oh, and the "eyes on the walls" refer to the paintings she's done all over her room. So yeah. HERE IT IS!

Tonight, I dream of a place I've never seen. A layer of snow glitters on the ground, but the air isn't cold. The sky is a pale shade of pink. The strangest thing is, there are roses growing everywhere––their vibrant, blood-red petals standing out against the starry whiteness.

My footsteps whisper against the snow. I gaze around in wonder, as an unfamiliar tingling feeling rushes through me. Whatever it is, it makes me turn around … and that's when I see him.

He kneels on the ground, his dark clothes standing out in the bright landscape. A rose pokes out of the snow near to him, and he reaches for it. His fingers curl around the stem, and he plucks the flower from the ground. A thorn pricks his skin, and drops of blood stain the snow red.

The edges of the petals fade from red to ashy gray. The darkness spreads like a burn, all the way down the shriveling stem. He lets the crumpled flower fall, where it lies in the bloodstained snow. He looks up, and I feel the electric shock of recognition when I meet his eyes, so dark that they're almost black. There's desperation in them, like he wants to tell me something.

But he doesn't have a chance to say it, because everything is already gone.

*

My heart beats violently, like it's trying to break out of my ribcage. I rub at the goose bumps on my arms, blurring the drawings on my skin. This is the time when I'd normally reach for my pen, but I've turned to stone. I close my eyes and I can see it still, painted on the backs of my eyelids. The white snow, the roses, drops of blood falling, the flower shriveling and dying, his dark eyes looking up into mine––questioning, pleading.

Restlessness overtakes my mind, dragging me out of bed. As I pace around my room, the eyes on the walls watch my every step.

I've never seen that part of the Otherworld. And he wasn't like the Othersouls that I'm used to encountering. He seemed more human.

More alive.

Because Answering Questions is Fun!

So, in my last post I asked if anyone had suggestions for what I should write about and I got three very good questions from Cora ... And I figured I'd just answer them in this post because they're probably useful to all you teenage novelists out there. Here we go!

1. How do you deal with the times when you just want to give up, crawl into bed and eat Cheetos because you won't ever finish this novel/project? Have this ever happened to you? If not, how did you stop it from happening, or was it just by chance that you never experienced this?

Hmm ... I don't think I've ever entirely lost faith in a novel. That is, even if I'm extremely frustrated with something, I figure I'm just not ready to write it and I'll move on and get back to it later. But sure, I've been in many writing slumps where I moped around going, "My book sucks ... It'll never be any good ... I'm going to bang my head against a wall ... Blaaahhh." But there's always something you can do to get yourself out of this slump.

My first suggestion would be––as hard as it is––force yourself to write. Just start with one sentence, and see what happens. A lot of the time, I discover that the only reason I was "stuck" was because I was being lazy and not trying. But if you absolutely can't think of anything, try doing something else. Make an outline, do character inventories, etc. Even move on to another project if you have to! Just because you set something aside temporarily doesn't mean you're giving up. Sometimes you can't help it, and you need to wait for inspiration to strike!

2. I've been working on this novel idea but a new one just sprung into my head. It's not as developed as my original idea, but I'm really excited about it. How do you get out of the cycle of this happening again and again?

Actually ... I don't. According to my "STUFF I'M WRITING" folder, I'm juggling 8 stories right now––and that's not counting all the ideas I have but haven't started yet. Granted, I haven't touched most of those stories in a long time, but that doesn't mean I won't go back to them.

There's nothing wrong with writing more than one story at once. If you have an idea––by all means, start writing it! I know how tempting new ideas are. They're all big and shiny, and not tainted with plot holes yet ... *sighs dreamily* It doesn't hurt to write a first chapter or two. But make sure that you don't have a thousand first chapters and no complete stories. Personally, I like to outline all my stories so I have an idea of where they're going; that way I have a reminder that yes, cool things will happen in this story so I shouldn't abandon it! You have to remember to finish what you start––but it could take months or years, and there could be other stories in between. For example, this is what my past year in writing has looked like:

1. Finished Walking Shadow
2. Edited Walking Shadow
3. Started Unraveling and Rage at about the same time
4. Continued writing Jump after about a 6-month break ... Wrote more of Unraveling and the occasional chapter of Rage
5. Edited Walking Shadow again
6. Kept writing Jump ... Also wrote the first chapters of Sky-Fall and Spill
7. Finished writing Jump
8. Didn't write much for a few months ... Maybe wrote a few chapters of Unraveling
9. Started writing Zenith and kept writing it for half of November ... Then halfway through November switched over to Unraveling, which I kept writing until the end of November
10. Edited Edge
11. Went back to Unraveling and finally finished it
12. And now I'm trying to decide between writing Rage or Sky-Fall while also outlining a bunch of things, and thinking about editing Walking Shadow yet again.

*Whew* So as you can see ... There are 8 stories mentioned in there, and I still managed to finish three of them! You just have to remember to go back to things you've started, even if it takes a while.


3. If you talk to parents/teachers/friends about writing novels, have you ever experienced the "Oh, good for you!" kind of reaction, when it's plain in their faces that they don't believe you're any good, based on your age? You're older by now, but did you deal with this when you were young?

Hmm. I don't remember ever getting a reaction like that––at least, I've never interpreted it that way. Usually I keep quiet about my writing, especially around adults ... but if it comes up, usually people seem pretty impressed and enthusiastic. Honestly, I don't think adults care about the quality of teenagers' writing; it's kind of a given that teen writing isn't perfect. But we all have to start off somewhere, and adults know that. If you tell an adult that you're a writer, he/she will probably just be impressed that you take the time to write in the first place. After all, it takes a lot of dedication.

And even if they do think, "Oh, she's probably no good" ... then so what? You can't control what other people think. But you know how much you love writing, and you know how good you are. So, isn't that all that matters?


Thanks for the questions, Cora! If anyone else has questions, feel free to ask :)